I BELIEVE... by Elizabeth Hipwell

I...
I be...
I beli...
I believe
I believe
I believe
At a loss
With leaden limbs
Hard to put one foot in front of another
Misplaced vim and vigor
Don't know where to start
How to construct the sentence that is my moment to shine
To be seen
A paragraph of minutes ticking by with no verb
No driving force
No action
No need to move ahead
To believe in something foreign
I believe...
In the negative self-talk
It's always with me
My constant companion
I know it
And it knows me well
I believe in a minuscule way that
I can become acquainted with an uplifting voice
One that says, "It's okay to want,
To need,
To have ambition.
To yearn for passion, joy, and truth."
I believe in the possibility,
But am terrified of the certainty.
It's easy to believe in others
To encourage
Give my time
Nurture
Love
These verbs are not easily applied towards myself
A deep and abiding fear of selfishness and cocky ego abound
Constructing that silent sentence of strong objectives
Intense follow through is challenging to the nth degree
I give into this self-loathing more often than I am willing to admit
I believe...
We are all worthy
We includes me
So I must matter too
I believe...
Life is short
We must make the most of what we've got
It's never too late
Or too soon
Kind of long in coming
My negative voices objections are quashed
They say, "It's too late for you."
I believe...
I say the mantra, "I believe..."
Over and over
Finishing the sentence with "...I am worthwhile
And have a great capacity for happiness and love."
I believe...
I believe...
I believe...
I believe...
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I be...
I beli...
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b...

-Elizabeth Hipwell