wants to hide
Fear
constant tears
Anger
unknown rage
locked in a cage
on a tight leash
Unable, unwilling, untrusting
to release
Caring support is
around
Yet she falls to
the ground,
this child can see
only through the
painful memories
Looking inside
Remembering why
needed to die
for her to
survive.
Now again, here they
are,
vibrant, strong
very much alive
and this child is
Screaming
"Do Not
Try!!!"
Caught between
wanting it so much
and the child’s
warning-
"Don't try to
touch!"
That Fear, That
Fall,
is all she can
see,
The desperate
impossible leap
to let myself
believe in me.
The past repeats
itself,
the reason she
hid the hopes on the
shelf
and pretended they were
dead
The feelings
Greater than words said
trying to express
what they’re about,
But always scared
to let them out.
Try asserting
“I deserve, I can, I
belong!”
but terrified
of being wrong.
the hopes, dreams
out there in a world
where Hope, Trust,
Safety
are nothing but
blurs.
The darkness is more
secure.
Alone, with all these
feelings to contend
This child can't trust
there’s a difference
between NOW and THEN
And I, her adult self,
can give no comfort
to my child within.
-Sharon H.
